Back to school for the simple love of learning?...wait, there are bills waiting to be paid!

This is about an insatiable need to study more, read more without worrying about the bills and monthly installments - will Life gift a chance to relive and recreate what was left incomplete? I have always felt that in terms of culture and social normality, I have been a very, very slow learner and in most situations where I should look suave and educated, I seem short-supplied, often searching for answers. My education was more than just academic learning but later it got too career-focused. I realize that I sacrificed many things that should have been experienced to grow, really develop as an individual.Now, that I am beyond 35, the cravings to learn, to excel in classrooms and study abroad are back and back, in a big way. But then again, ditching your full-time job to pursue the more dreamy stuff is perhaps not the best plan right now. For some, it might not seem like the best plan during any phase of life. Things like Music and Architecture make all the right music now but during the growing-up and early college years, the same subjects seemed mundane and stupid.

Now, spending time within the campus and spending years on research subjects that might lead to a very personalized, very individualistic sort of accomplishment does not look like a poor lifestyle choice. The gnawing feeling to own top-end luxury cars owned by CEOs and similarly positioned fraternity  has been replaced by a desperation to excel in small courses that I can manage along with my job but the latter is unrelenting. From travel time to commuting for home chores, from bad days on the office floors to trying to do everything on a Sunday, it seems that time is now meant to be responsible all the time, more dutiful and answerable rather than someone who cares about the carbon footprints of some Parisian community in a Mediterranean nation. It is not about how much money you have parked for a rainy day but the recurring expenses that need a steady income and when you are planning a family and have a household that is shaping-up, yet to be mature enough to handle any and every lifestyle requirement, the expenses come through without fail and you need that security of a full-time job. Does that mean saying goodbye to these scholarly dreams? Not sure but for now, it is paused...